Nostradamus’ last work “Loseracious” predicted the end of the world not as previously thought in the year 2000 but in the year 2009. The final sign of the apocalypse would be “when single men who’d otherwise have zero chances of getting any chase women out of bars.”
Such a thing it has now been found has indeed happened.
In a bizzare incident in the Eastern Hemisphere, a group of men in Mangalore chased a group of women out of a pub on Saturday afternoon.
The attack was carried out by members of the dubiously named Sri Ram Sena, who said they had received complaints from the public about the presence of young women.
Rama historically had used a valiant force of civilized monkeys, these however seem to be of the “flinging shit in trees” variety.
“The public had complained to us,” said Dip Shitty, caterer to the Sri Ram Sena.
“The police have made ten arrests in the case – charging the men with criminal assault, intimidation, outrage of modesty and criminal trespass.” report several commercially successful news groups.
AVX Shenoy however disputes their claim of being right, right wingers or even Hindus.
“If they truly wanted to return to the India of the past they would have to politely request all men
and women to be topless. But this is again only the middle ages. To truly go back to the India of the past we’d have to move large parts of the subcontinent towards Africa. My own right wing group called the Correct Wing has a several bands of topless men and women pushing the continent towards Africa.”
The Sri Ram Sena however has received support from the Lashkar, the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia, and two dimunitve male Black Widow spiders.
Doomsday cults have begun preparations however and give the world till this tuesday. In this time of need they were seen handing out CDs of Britney Spears’ latest album, another sign of the Apocalypse mentioned by Nostradamus in his last book “Loseracious”
