Air India was instrumental in evacuating rich Indians from protest-hit nations in the Middle East. But who will come to the rescue of rich Indians from Britain when the massive boredom generated by the overhype of the WillKat wedding hits?
The Air India strike has irritated a lot of passengers this year and surprised many more. Most importantly, it’s put India’s national carrier on pause during what might be an hour of need. Air India did earn itself some good publicity during the evacuation of rich Indians from Egypt during the pro-democracy unrest there earlier in the year. (They were accused by some people of flying out only those Indians with money etc). But a much larger evacuation is looming large on the horizon.
Tomorrow is the date set for the incredibly hyped legal mating of the son of the Prince of Wales and Kate Middleton. The beleaguered British tourism department has raked in millions promoting this snooze of an event as a great attraction. Experts such as AVX Shenoy and Thabish have warned that a massive wave of boredom might break out among wealthy Indians visiting Britain both to see the wedding and to just spend money in quicker manner since the pound is running at 74 against the rupee.
“As far as weddings go, well, British weddings are like British cuisine. They think boiled potato is cuisine, and are easily impressed with the exotic French practise of frying potatoes. Compare that to the curry and you’ll have an idea of how boring their weddings are likely to be when compared against a Punjabi wedding. But Indians love everything foreign so they’ll go and watch the parade against the Foreign Ministry’s advisement and they’ll we’ll have to evacuate the lot of them. About 3,000 people may just lapse into a catatonic state and we’ll need Air India on hand to help with the evacuation,” said AVX Shenoy.
“Shenoy is right, the MEA has raised the boring alert on Britain owing to the royal wedding. It’s depressing really for Air India to not be on hand when this might happen, they can’t behave in this manner when there are great airlines like Indigo around. I’m surprised people are still flying Air India. Yeah, sometimes I’ll promote large corporations for free. In 2011 the headlines read “passengers inconvenienced’ by 2020 the headline will read ‘Air India on strike again: passenger inconvenienced’. I guess they’ll get what’s coming to them,” averred Thabish.
This report is a part of Volume 1 of the Outhouse Letters. Click on the image to see more details
